Walking around lost with disgust and looking for a place to throw my cigarette when a local mumbled towards me with a confused look, "Throw it anywhere, India is garbage". I just nodded as to agree with his holly words and throw it.
I lived many experiences, going out with local to a local bar, meeting a great french couple with who I shared a great day visiting Gandi's museums, had interesting conversation about values and the effect of India, but mostly I have been sharping my senses to find beauty somewhere.
I was born in what I remember as a great place just to go back later and see that my birthplace was small and dirty compared to the 1st world reality. I think I have grown accustomed to cleanness and north American order which has nothing to to with Delhi. I've been disgusted by this place 3 years ago and I just confirmed this now.
Same way as Ying and Yang, in everything there's good and bad. The good is that this challenge of what I thought normal opened the gates to a beautiful place inside. I have relived a lot of my childhood in the last couple of days. Going to the mountains with my parents climbing trees, travelling in train with my dad.
I really think that travel was on my life's path in order to remember...
I used to be a simple kid enjoying the moment by playing and discovering life, now I'm reuniting with him once again. This could have been possible back in Canada, but destiny decided otherwise and sent me on this great adventure that just begins.
There's a great book that I devoured which I recommend to anyone and that sums greatly how I feel now. The name is Aleph and it's the last book of Coelho. It's funny because I have read all his books and it seems to apply to me. Guess that's what make a great writer when people can relate to your books.
The next scene happened 2 days ago, while waiting for a local that I met on couchsurfing in order to have a coffee in a crowded touristy place. Keep in mind that back in Montreal when I go out with the guys in a bar or club I usually spend 4-8$ on a pint of beer leaving 1-2$ tip, but money is just a way to measure the amount of work done and it's importance in society. Back to the scene, since it's a touristy place there a LOT of poor people and the difference between society's block are enormous. I'm used to see kids begging and following me for 5 minutes to ask money, they're covered in dirt and know just the words to break your heart. After ignoring a couple of them to get to the meeting spot, all of a sudden this beggar with a small girl came barely walking asking for money. Since I don't believe in free passes, I politely ignored him, after a couple of minutes he gave up just to sit on the floor, lift his right pant over his knee leaving a huge bulge show. While the little girl looked through garbage to find something to eat, eventually finding some kind of yogurt bottle, her "dad" started pushing on the bulge letting the white infected liquid come out together with blood. I couldn't feel more selfish, imagining already how this human been will probably die of hunger probably leaving the young girl alone. I felt so impotent and selfish, because I could have gave him 10 cents and it would have helped. When I think about it know I feel even worst waiting money on beer and tips when I could have maybe made a difference. Eventually my friend got there and reality shifted.
Funny how some people's truth and values are just products of their social conditioning. For example the local that I wen to the bar with believed that the right way to live is to make money, get married by accepting his parent's choice of women and raising kids. His truth has nothing to do with mine, but I do respect it.
I like to believe in love, destiny and connection, but maybe it's just a byproduct of the great American dream.
I've added some pictures of Delhi on my picassa: http://picasaweb.google.com/braikoff
Now, my plane for Goa leaves in about 3 hours and I have to be on my way with a tear in my eyes opened at last. I was looking the other way all this time pushing further the inevitable...time to face the darker sides
I lived many experiences, going out with local to a local bar, meeting a great french couple with who I shared a great day visiting Gandi's museums, had interesting conversation about values and the effect of India, but mostly I have been sharping my senses to find beauty somewhere.
I was born in what I remember as a great place just to go back later and see that my birthplace was small and dirty compared to the 1st world reality. I think I have grown accustomed to cleanness and north American order which has nothing to to with Delhi. I've been disgusted by this place 3 years ago and I just confirmed this now.
Same way as Ying and Yang, in everything there's good and bad. The good is that this challenge of what I thought normal opened the gates to a beautiful place inside. I have relived a lot of my childhood in the last couple of days. Going to the mountains with my parents climbing trees, travelling in train with my dad.
I really think that travel was on my life's path in order to remember...
I used to be a simple kid enjoying the moment by playing and discovering life, now I'm reuniting with him once again. This could have been possible back in Canada, but destiny decided otherwise and sent me on this great adventure that just begins.
There's a great book that I devoured which I recommend to anyone and that sums greatly how I feel now. The name is Aleph and it's the last book of Coelho. It's funny because I have read all his books and it seems to apply to me. Guess that's what make a great writer when people can relate to your books.
The next scene happened 2 days ago, while waiting for a local that I met on couchsurfing in order to have a coffee in a crowded touristy place. Keep in mind that back in Montreal when I go out with the guys in a bar or club I usually spend 4-8$ on a pint of beer leaving 1-2$ tip, but money is just a way to measure the amount of work done and it's importance in society. Back to the scene, since it's a touristy place there a LOT of poor people and the difference between society's block are enormous. I'm used to see kids begging and following me for 5 minutes to ask money, they're covered in dirt and know just the words to break your heart. After ignoring a couple of them to get to the meeting spot, all of a sudden this beggar with a small girl came barely walking asking for money. Since I don't believe in free passes, I politely ignored him, after a couple of minutes he gave up just to sit on the floor, lift his right pant over his knee leaving a huge bulge show. While the little girl looked through garbage to find something to eat, eventually finding some kind of yogurt bottle, her "dad" started pushing on the bulge letting the white infected liquid come out together with blood. I couldn't feel more selfish, imagining already how this human been will probably die of hunger probably leaving the young girl alone. I felt so impotent and selfish, because I could have gave him 10 cents and it would have helped. When I think about it know I feel even worst waiting money on beer and tips when I could have maybe made a difference. Eventually my friend got there and reality shifted.
Funny how some people's truth and values are just products of their social conditioning. For example the local that I wen to the bar with believed that the right way to live is to make money, get married by accepting his parent's choice of women and raising kids. His truth has nothing to do with mine, but I do respect it.
I like to believe in love, destiny and connection, but maybe it's just a byproduct of the great American dream.
I've added some pictures of Delhi on my picassa: http://picasaweb.google.com/braikoff
Now, my plane for Goa leaves in about 3 hours and I have to be on my way with a tear in my eyes opened at last. I was looking the other way all this time pushing further the inevitable...time to face the darker sides
Explore, share, grow are really good things. At the same time, explore means experience and learn, necessary for any kind of growth. So I think it’s a good lesson to experience the contact with another kind of reality, misery, poorness and dirt; another polarity of life - something like yin and yang. There are too many people in need and it’s practically impossible for you as a tourist to help them. It is a good thing you compassioned with him because finally it was like an emotional bridge between two human beings. It’s good to do a gift, to help somebody not only materially; you could give a part of your time, of your attention, a smile.
ReplyDeleteAcum imi dau seama ca ma surprinzi cu câteva expresii care sunt foarte adevarate: "Making Choices", "Everything happens for a reason". In viata facem o multime de alegeri (optiuni) si cam tot ce se intâmpla are un sens. Sunt convins ca Goa iti va place mult caci se afla pe malul oceanului si este o fosta colonie portugheza daca nu ma insel. Comentariul in engleza tot eu l-am scris. Nu prea stiu cum sa fac ca sa nu mai apara anonimus, eventual semnez Alex senior
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